For people like me, getting off sugar takes something much more, much bigger than a 30-day sugar detox or just saying “I’m getting off sugar.” It took me getting entirely off it – not on my own power, but someone else’s. That someone else was God. He put the people in my life that knew better than me what I needed to do to get me off of it. It could no longer be an intention. It couldn’t be, “I’m stopping this tomorrow.” I needed help NOW. This was not something I could pretend I could do on my own or just do because I was committed to it. I needed something greater than me because I wasn’t so great at stopping the sugar myself. I see it everywhere, everyday. I see people giving power to the sugar, letting it run their lives. I’ve seen my mom go through it. I’ve seen myself go through it. I do NOT want to give that stuff power in my toughest moments, like the grief I’m going through today. That’s why I went back to where they prescribed me my food plan, because I knew that I wanted to get anchored in it again as I walk through this pain. Thankfully I wasn’t turning to it to ease my  pain. That power is gone, thank God. But I did allow it back in my life and it was just too close. Right now I’m too emotionally raw, and a little stressed to let it be there. That’s okay for me. I know what I need today.

We have seasons of emotional hardship, of stress, of pain – we can’t begin to think we’re alone and we certainly do NOT have to give that sugar the power. But the moment we surrender and realize there is something more powerful that can come between the sugar and us (I promise you it’s stronger than sugar) is the moment we get a taste of freedom. That freedom has given me a life and today it’s giving me the clarity to live as I walk through this grief without turning to that sugar one day at a time.

So if you are in your first minute, first hour, first day, or first few weeks of trying to get through no-sugar, just know there are ways – bigger ways than you can imagine, AND resources to give you what you need. You are NOT ALONE!

 To gain self-control, give God control.

 Author Unknown

I walk into the locker room and I see a woman who often shows up a few minutes late and doesn’t get a bike. She is on a mission to get up there and get one – like if she doesn’t get it, the world will end. In the past, I probably would have raced her up there. (Ha)  Today, my Healthy Voice says, “You get a bike, you get a bike. You don’t, you don’t.” I’m chatting with the instructor Lisa outside of class because I haven’t seen her for a few weeks. I walk in and the bees are swarming. You’d think it was Black Friday but in the spin room. Is there a sale or something? Lisa says, “Go grab my bike.” I look up and I say, “It’s taken.” At this point, I want you to think about what you’d do. Would you freak because you were waiting all morning to do this class and now this crew just threw you off so you have this huge desire to throw someone off a bike? Or….do you respond and adapt to the situation.

Because of the gifts I’ve received in my recovery I was able without even thinking to just say goodbye to Lisa and find something else to do. I didn’t have to huff and puff or tell someone I needed to be there more than them. In fact my Healthy Voice piped in pretty quickly and said, “You got a half-marathon coming up in one month from today (huh), how about jumping on the treadmill?” And so I did, and I actually ended up having a very nice run. Between my tunes and the old-timers next to me on the treadmills running at a nice clip – I felt good. I was exactly where I needed to be and didn’t think once about that spin room. What a blessing for someone who used to be a complete exercise addict. Even better, I took my time – picked up the pace, slowed it down, had some water. I enjoyed my run where before I would have been trying to beat those guys. Growth, is all I gotta say.

Friends, workouts are important, but they aren’t the end of the world if you don’t get the one you want.  If you don’t get in a class or you miss one, or you are injured – do something different or enjoy the rest. Variety and rest and two beautiful things when it comes to your physical health. If you are open to adapting, you’ll probably find exactly what you needed, just like I did today. My HP had a different workout planned for me and that’s cool. Going with the flow is a beautiful thing! (not saying I do it all the time – but felt grateful to do it with a workout today).

What if while you are trying to decide what it’s going to take to get you healthy right now, you didn’t just think about just your physical health? What if you thought about the rest of you? Don’t know if you know this – but newsflash. You are more than your weight. I know. It’s a shocker. You are a beautiful human being with emotions and a spirit that need nurturing too.  If you only work on the physical, you’ll be feeding the beast that is the Unhealthy Voice that wants to keep you on the surface and completely distracted from your deeper self. I know you are all about, “If I could just lose this roll, I’d be good.” Yeah – there is always something. I got a roll here and there too. How about this year considering not fixing yourself for your Unhealthy Voice, and just doing what you need to do for you because you deserve to shut that thing up and feel good in your skin?!

‘Cause here’s the deal – if you realize life goes beyond that number on the scale, you can start to realize you are more than it. If you choose that workout, that nutrition program – that thing that gets you grounded – you’ve got your first start. You are making a physical step despite how you may feel. You are now free to move about the cabin that is LIFE! Don’t mess with obsessing about your body, your pant size, your snacks – OMG it’s such a waste of energy. Let that stuff be your grounding and then move onto LIVING! I know it’s not easy. But that’s where I’m going to take you – in my book and on my website. You’ll be able through my story to see your own so you can let it go and finally get the tool to help you navigate life with food in it. THEN my website will give you all sorts of ways to live it every day. It’s an adventure I can’t wait for you to join me on. 2012 is going to be a GOOD year for us!

Until then…some mental food for thought…

This week I’ve been working on the Healthy Voice Manifesto. I’ve seen a lot of people whose brands have these on their website, so I thought I’d give one a shot. It helps you know what this Healthy Voice ™ thing is all about and essentially – gives you a taste of how you can tap into yours.

So when you are making your list of resolutions – consider these as another piece of the puzzle, not another thing to do – another way to know and love yourself even more. It’s probably what you haven’t felt like you’ve had permission to even consider believing. Permission – granted.

Enjoy and let me know what you think! Btw, stay tuned for a New Years Eve Post on what I’m doing to get grounded physically so I can go deeper into my Healthy Voice in the New Year.  Stay tuned for later in the week I’ll share with you how I’m starting off the new year in a way I’m pretty psyched about called, “My Physical Grounding for the New Year”

THE HEALTHY VOICE ™ MANIFESTO

This is about going deeper than your surface to live your most fulfilling life.

This is about being strong in your body so you can be strong in your mind and spirit, not more obsessed with your body. That’s not you – that’s your mind.

Your weight is just the result of your thoughts, feelings, and physical reactions to life. This is not about finally finding the zinger solution to the problem you think is your weight. You are distracting yourself by focusing on only one piece of the puzzle. Get to know yourself and everything that makes you who you are so you can begin to nurture the self that has been begging you to all along!

It’s about owning your power in your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual life. It’s about how deep you want to go, not how deep someone is telling you that you have to go. You get to go as deep as you want.

This is about knowing that life is about walking THROUGH life and all it’s ups and downs. No need to stop and fix you. You will get through it.

This is about letting that Healthy Voice within you shine for the world to see.

This is not about beating yourself up when you fall. You can put down the stick. You are done with that self-abusive perfectionist. This is about loving yourself, nurturing yourself and GROWING EVERY TIME YOU FALL.

It’s about knowing how to tap into your Healthy Voice in and around you.

This is about knowing that life isn’t a dress rehearsal and you got one moment – that is now, no sense focusing on the past or the outcomes of the future. There IS NO BETTER VERSION OF YOU, only a better way to live within you.

This is about knowing the people, the places, and the things that will keep you strong when you’ve got to navigate those things that trigger your Unhealthy Voice in life – because they will. The stronger your Healthy Voice is – physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually – the more prepared you will be for life.

Change is the only thing that is constant in this life. No workout, diet, person, or thing can give you ultimate security, except that which created you. Rely on it.  Swim out halfway by getting grounded as you can in mind, body and spirit because I can tell you when life does happen – the workout and the diet won’t be enough to help you navigate your emotional self.

You’ve got that Unhealthy Voice. You can’t pretend it’s not there until you face the fear it thrives in. When you know it, what it’s made of, where it shows up – you can finally navigate it. Take away its power and you find your own power.

You don’t have to have a Healthy Voice. You GET to. You get to CHOOSE it every single day of your life instead of your victimhood. It’s called willingness and that’s all you need to hear it. If you are – it will take you on the ride of your life and keep taking you further and further on it. You won’t know what’s coming to you – because it’s much bigger and better than that number on the scale you’ve been told to believe is the ultimate barometer of success in life.

Meredith Terpeluk, Healthy Voice ©

http://vimeo.com/34046413

“Each life travels at it’s own speed and carries it’s own meaning. When we will reach the end none of us knows. So we run on until our seasons come to a finish and what matters is not only how we reach that line, but why.”

This guy is 61 with ALS. This team of girls he coaches found out and they said, “Let’s do this for Jim.”

My dad was 63. About two weeks before, I was with him in Austin, TX and I finally committed to completing the manuscript of my book. God said to me loudly, “Just do this Meredith. I’ll take care of the rest.” Then he took Dad. But, I can tell you, I haven’t let it stop me. I’m writing this for Dad. And I’m not stopping until the race is done. I know it’s part of God’s plan for me and I know Dad’s putting the wind in my sails to get it done.

Josephine, thanks for posting. Don’t worry – I know you are waiting for this book and I won’t stop until it’s in your hands. Remember what they said at the end, ”Maybe what matters is not only how we reach the line, but who crosses that line – with us.” You are writing it with me. Your inspiring notes and letters and our time together on the plane have inspired so much of my work. Thank you. I can’t wait for you to read it

Monday was a rough one. By the end of the day I was just out of it. The CDs I was making to send to my family weren’t recording. The pictures I was trying to print weren’t printing and then I get into the car only to hear a Nat King Cole Christmas song which pretty much made me lose it. Thankfully a few angels showed up to comfort me in my moment of missing Dad immensely. The next day was better – much better. But then the next day, yesterday was the day I got this flu bug. Somehow I powered through some of my book in the morning and a 2-hour phone call but then I couldn’t pick myself up off the couch and my tummy was crazy. I’ve learned in my recovery that when I have a physical challenge – it’s usually God’s way of telling me to take a step back and relax. Whether it’s a working out injury or being sick – there isn’t much I can do about it – except be sick and sleep. It’s permission to just BE because you can’t be anything else. You physically cannot be running out there with all the nut jobs on the road at Christmas. You have to be on the couch. So you deal with it and you embrace it. So that’s what I did. I’ve hated how it’s felt, miserable. But I’ve enjoyed it because I haven’t had to deal with the madness. I got a chapter done in my book that had to get done. I’ve talked to some dear friends whom I love. I got to Skype with my Mom. I’ve enjoyed being sick. I know the gifts will get wrapped (hopefully tonight), the packages will get sent. I’ll workout when I workout (although I do wish I could go to my favorite yoga class tonight). But it’s okay. I’ll go when I go.

When it comes down to it, what matter is this: I’m where I’m supposed to be, feeling what I’m supposed to feel.

Being sick the week of Christmas the year you’ve lost your Dad brings it all into perspective. It’s the little things. The people you love in your life and the ones you love across the miles. That’s it. Love. It’s not about the gifts, but the love. I saw a church sign the other day that said, “All we want is your presence.” It made me think of God and Dad. I know they will both be with me this week and all it’s bittersweet moments. I know Dad’s in heaven but I know he’s present with me every minute. I know he’s comforting each person in my family that he loves so much during this time. I know he’s shining down on Diane on her birthday today. I know he’s shining down on my brother Trey and my cousin Taylor. I know he’ll be with us at the Basilica on Christmas Eve and at the grotto when I light a candle for him. I know it’s going to be tough. But I know we’ll all get through it because that’s what Christmas is all about. Jesus is our present at Christmas and this Christmas we get an extra gift. We get an extra special angel with huge wings wrapped around us at the time when we need it most and that’s pretty special. Merry Christmas friends…

“Be where you are and be okay with that place”

                  A favorite yoga instructor and mentor of mine often uses this mantra in her classes.  At first glance, this seems like a fairly easy concept to understand and apply.  But is it?  I often reflect on this mantra and each time I do, I think of a new way that it can be used in my life.  This idea is much more than the simple phrase it appears to be.  It is an invitation to bring forth acceptance, peace, and contentment in one’s life.

I invite you to reflect on this idea and explore how content you are with yourself.  Not just overall, but in all the finite aspects of your being.  Can you accept who you are, even if you aren’t quite who you wish to be yet?  Can you accept your wobbly leg in tree pose or needing to lower your knees in chaturanga? Can you accept that you aren’t where you wish to be in your career?

We’re accustomed to setting goals for ourselves, accomplishing tasks, moving ahead, and keeping our eyes on the prize.  But what about right now?  What about being okay with where you are right now, embracing the moment, and for once letting go of what has been and will be.

Beyond the asanas that are practiced during our hatha yoga class, there is so much more that your yoga practice can do for you.  The practice of yoga is structured to bring unity between our body, mind, and spirit.  Often students begin their yoga practice hoping to stretch out tight muscles and gain flexibility, but soon realize the benefits that this ancient science can have on their minds and emotions.

If you haven’t tried it yet, what are you waiting for?

Namaste,

Roxie Sweikar, Instructor at Solace Yoga Studio

Mishawaka, Indiana

Perhaps one of the biggest gifts of recovery I have discovered is self-forgiveness. For years my disease made me feel immense shame and guilt that time and again perpetuated my eating disorder. I was stuck in a viscous cycle of acting in my eating disorder, hating myself for it and feeling like the only thing I had to turn to was food because I didn’t deserve anything better.

Today things are different. In this long and challenging process of recovery and discovering my healthy voice (for me recovery and my Healthy Voice are one and the same) I have learned to forgive myself. Not only to forgive myself for my past and the ugly things I have done in my eating disorder but also forgiving myself each and every day for being perfectly imperfect. God didn’t create me to be perfect and not make mistakes. What fun would life be if there were no lessons to be learned or challenges to overcome?

We have all done shameful things. Believe me, I have done some pretty sick things in my own sickness. Things I thought no one else could stoop so low to do, but in my support group I have discovered that this disease can get the best of anyone and that others have done exactly what I have. Others have done these horrible things and I can still love them. They are still lovable and the ones who can forgive themselves are the ones who have strong recovery and follow their healthy voice every day. I am still lovable despite all the things that have happened in the past and despite all the mistakes I make every day.

So then how do you even do this self-forgiveness  thing? Well, it’s not easy. Mending your relationship with yourself after any amount of time of self-hatred takes time. I definitely had to use the old “fake it till ya make it,” tool. For a period of time, I had to tell myself every day that I am a good person and that I am NOT my past.  The only things in the world I can change is this present moment. So even if a second ago I let my unhealthy voice take over, right now I can choose to listen to the healthy voice. It helps a lot to slow down for a second when the unhealthy voice takes over and breath for a second. Sometimes I say the serenity prayer sometimes I just take a couple very deep (very loud, I don’t really care anymore if people look at me weirdly) breaths. From there, I have a choice. I can decide to love myself. Part of loving myself, is choosing to listen to my healthy voice and telling my unhealthy voice to get lost (that is putting it lightly, my unhealthy voice has been mean to me, so from time to time I am mean right back at it!).

The guilt and the shame inside you, can literally eat you alive. Think how free you would feel to follow your healthy voice if that guilt and shame were not there. Part of getting rid of it is to forgive yourself for your past and the mistakes you make in the present. If God or your higher power can forgive you, why can’t you forgive you? You are stronger and better than your mistakes. Believe it.

But I challenge you with this – do you know you are more than that? Do you know that sheer and utter fulfillment in life does not mean a harder, meaner workout, or a stricter diet? Do you know that there is a power greater than you that wants you to see your value no matter how much that number on the scale is changing or how “well” you’ve eaten this week?

In working on the introduction of my book this week, I found myself writing about this Healthy Voice and what it is really all about. Someone can immediately think that I’m going to teach them how to workout and eat right. That’s probably natural. But what they don’t know is that I go so much deeper. I go so much deeper I don’t even touch that. That part has become too political and too much of a religion for people almost. There is a reason I’m not a fitness or nutrition expert.

All that I do know is that we are more than our bodies. I spent way too many years thinking that I had to get my body just right. I’m here to tell you that there is no magic bullet and your mission of weight-loss does not have to be the center of your life. It really doesn’t.

You, my friend – are the magic bullet. Your power within you – that you can certainly harness with physical health goes beyond it. Because getting in shape or whatever you are doing to get grounded is just the beginning. So if that’s where you are at, consider going deeper – not into a tougher workout or a more extreme diet, or to fixing yourself more — but to yourself. What is it in your mind that has been telling you it’s all about your body? How is that Unhealthy Voice distracting you? And what is it in your spirit that tells you you are good enough no matter how hard you workout, that you don’t see? How have you been missing your Healthy Voice?

Don’t ever forget that you aren’t just a body. There is more to you – an amazing being with a mind-body-spirit that is wanting you to embrace ALL of you – inside and out. Get exploring. You’ll be surprised at what you find

Did you see this piece above in the NY times on November 23rd?

There is lots of talk lately about the “fat gene” and I gotta say it annoys me a bit. Why, you might ask. Well, because to me, having been in the shoes of feeling like I can’t get the weight off my body, I see it as just another scare tactic for the “fat” person to feel like they have to change. “Oh, and you’ve got a bad gene so you are screwed. Good Luck.” Reynolds even says it herself. “These findings would seem to suggest that most of us are doomed to be tubby.” Yes, can you say Unhealthy Voice?

Here’s my thought:

Let’s stop making the genetic part of this whole weight/obesity crisis a chance to disempower people. Let’s empower them with knowledge about themselves. When we did the Curves Complete curriculum we talked about Genetics as a major factor in all of this. Yes, it is ONE factor among many! Is it the cause? No. I know America is just dying to get to that one zinger that causes the obesity, but it’s never going to happen — because there are just too many factors in play that contribute to the root cause for each individual.

If someone can know their genetics aren’t holding them back, they can actually empower themselves to change. Let me give you an example. I’ve got the gene of slow metabolism in my family. I don’t know who had it, but I’ve got it. So, ever since I was a kid packing on weight, I’ve known this but it wasn’t until I got walking/running in high school and college that I dealt with it. Now working out is part of my lifestyle, because I choose empowerment.  I started working with my genes (and actually fitting into jeans at the same time.)

The beauty is not only that it’s helped me maintain weight physically. It’s helped keep me sane mentally. (That a whole other research topic – how exercise positively affects your brain chemistry.) That brings me to the other huge genetic factor. It isn’t just physical health like diabetes. It’s mental illness like addiction, depression, anxiety that runs in families. For example, I have anxiety in my history. There is depression in my family. Guess what else there is? Addiction. Yes, it took me years to make the connection between the way I ate and even exercised and the addiction gene. I had it with food…and lots of other things. But now it empowers me because I know that I’ve got that gene so I know my limits, which allows me to make better decisions. An amazing thing. You’d think it would disempower you – nope. That’s society’s Unhealthy Voice about what addiction really is that does that. So, you have a choice. You can embrace you genetics and say, “I got diabetes” or “I got a slow metabolism” or “I got a food addiction” and I’m going to do something about it and get moving?! Or you can hang out on the couch and eat bon-bons watching Biggest Loser.

That to me is more motivation than anything, cause I know it’s empowered me and I’m grateful for it!